Worry Wart!

Why must I worry so? I really hate to worry about everything lately. I have figured out that when I am trying to fall asleep at night all I can do is worry and freak out in my head. Then I wake up in a panic because I fell asleep worrying or worse I hear Allie crying. I need to learn to clear my head let things go and pick them up tomorrow if need be. I also need to learn to let other people help or let things of if they really don't matter. Worry will get me no where.

I love the peace of night to think to myself to try to figure out simple problems but even more solve the big ones. I sometimes think I am trying to do to much at once but I can't stop or I would sink and then I would NEVER sleep. I would turn into the wart they always talk about the Worry Wart! Oh and that would not be a pretty sight.

Fabric Food!

So some of you may know and other's may not but either way I need to write or talk about it because well, I don't know how I feel about it. My body for some time has not really been my friend. I know I have done things in the past to anger it well now it is lashing out it ways well I never dreamed of. So after tests and tests and more tests and well a couple of surgeries here and there the last 3 years......My Dr. for now has put me on a High Fiber Diet..................AKA Fabric Foods.

First of all things I hate the word Diet. Yes I know I am over weight and yes I know I eat wrong a lot of the time but there is not one thing I like with the word DIET in it. I hate diet drinks and diet food. I feel like there is a FORCE that is coming at me telling me if you don't it means more tests and more surgeries which is true.

SO I have to suck it up and think of it differently. Problem is more and more each day I learn how Nutrition dumb I am. I am seriously so stupid about food. I never realized that some of the things I eat if I just steamed them instead of ate them raw are better for me. Or that some of the foods I thought were not that great are some of the best. Who knew. Crown me Nutrition Dummy because then at least it comes with diamonds!

Ok so I understand that Dr. or Lab tech's need time to run these so called TEST'S but do they know what it does to a person to wait 5 to 7 days. I hate waiting for tests it is the worst part. The waiting and wondering then.......The call comes.....you notice the number you take a deep breath and and blow it out then you answer....The Dr. says...........WHAT????? (ok so usually the answer I get is the tests were normal or I get the they were inconclusive so we need to check on that if if causes and more problems) I am the MYSTERY the Mystery Woman with the weird body that they can Never give it a name.......I PRAY IT HAS A NAME THIS TIME!!!! Please Please PLEASE have a name. I just want to move on move forward and have ENERGY and be able to exercise again so then yes world. I can lose weight.........So now I wait!.....wait for the call and pray it has a name, any name and even more a solution so that I can move forward and not feel like I am Sitting at a table stuck eating Fabric Food!

Ramblings of Dancing Shampoo Yo Yo's

Today I talked to my best friend Angie...Oh how I miss her. She makes life sound so excited and well because her life is. Then as I was telling her about what has happened in mine it was depressing and stressful. SO right then I stopped and asked her how she does it. She laughed and said You told me happy things too. Allie, Hair and Family but the sad thing is in my mind it was stressing too. So today I am going to tell you the Happy part

Allie is my JOY! She has the most amazing hugs and kisses. I love it when she comes into a room and just says my name and I respond "yes, Allie" she pauses and says....MOM I LOVE YOU!!! She is my little helper she keeps me going. She begs me to do dishes with her and cook and clean her room. It makes me laugh because my child wants to clean ALL THE TIME. She is my little dancer and will come and show me her new moves and her dancing feet. Allie will do anything to take a bath except poop on the toilet of course. My Favorite thing Allie does everyday is she becomes obsessed with one book an

d has to carry it around the house and read it to everyone and with everyone, even the bath tub. Today is Dinosaurs Beware" DONT eat the soap Mom it will make you sick and go to the DR. the she coughs and says we should give him some water because in Allie's world when you are sick you need water. Life is Magical in Allie's world and I am so Lucky to be apart of it. Gus Gus and Mary (the mice from Cinderella) are at our house every day along with thousands of Fairies that help clean and dance. One of my favorite among many funny things that Allie does is she LOVES using big words Like dazzling, disgusting, fabulous and gorgeous. it is so funny when she puts them in her words it makes me laugh and I always try to get her to tell me them again. Allie is my joy and I can't wait to hear her next Humm or song or story she has to tell me.

Hair is a fascinating thing even though I don't have a salon right now my joy is doing my Grandma Sonntag's Hair every week. I love making her fee

l beautiful and when I finish I feel more accomplished then I have in a long time. I Love knowing that my Grandma looks forwards to our time together and she is so grateful that I take my time and make her look like the Gorgeous Dish she is. I am starting a New Challenge with Hair I am working on my 1940's styles and Updo's or course but also looking for inspiration.

Family ahh I would be lost without you. You lift me up everyday and you always seem to call at just the right time. You have ESP you just know when I need you. Thank you for loving me and telling me the exciting things your families are doing or even better letting me join in the excitement.

Hope you enjoyed my ramblings!